When I'm a Big Boy

At the beginning of the swim season, M and B used to love watching the older kids jumping/diving/belly flopping off of the diving board. In fact, quite often they would make me swim them to the deep end to get a closer look and to await the excitement of getting splashed. One of those first days I asked M if he wanted to jump off the diving board. ( I want it noted that this was just conversation. I did not really think that this was a possibility for at least a few years.) M turned to me, all seriousness, and said, "I'll jump off the dive board when I'm a big boy, Mommy."

Tonight, Papa Bear and I took the boys to the pool to meet some friends for a BBQ and an evening swim. We had burgers and hot dogs and then got into the pool to cool off and let the kids have some fun. Minutes after getting into the pool, some of the older kids began jumping off of the diving board and as usual, the boys wanted to watch.

As a nice side-effect of M's swim lessons, M has really begun enjoying jumping into the pool from the side over the past week. (His lessons started a week and a half ago and he has already learned so much.) As we watched the older kids jumping from the diving board I asked M if he wanted to try it as well. I was in complete shock when M said he would like to try.

I quickly called P.B. over to take care of B so that M and I could swim to the deep end. I helped M to climb out of the pool and watched him assume his place at the end of the line of children waiting their moment of free-fall. M climbed onto the board and began his march to the end of the platform. I thought to myself, "This is it. He's going to stand at the end of the board in indecision and then finally just get off in fear and defeat." But, alas, I am thrilled to report that M proved me wrong and I am ashamed to have had that thought.

The dare-devil walked to the end of that diving board, ordered me to come a bit closer to him and jumped right into my arms. I was so happy for him. The smile of success on his face was pure bliss for my heart and as big as the splash his little body made upon entering the water. There is nothing like watching your child do something that he so badly wants, despite his feelings of fear.

As we swam to the side of the pool, I asked M if he wanted to jump again. He said yes, and we spent the next half hour following the same routine. It was absolutely amazing and I still have butterflies in my stomach as I sit here writing about this. M has always been so cautious, so to see him throw that caution to the wind was an absolute dream.

Tonight, I sit here reflecting M's words of just a couple of months ago. "I'll jump off the dive board when I'm a big boy, Mommy." I remember this statement with bittersweet fondness. I am so very proud of him and glad that he is assuming more risks. On the other hand, I am so very sad that he is growing up and quickly becoming that "big boy" of which he spoke.